How to free yourself, change your life & achieve real happiness
This book is a distillation of Adler’s philosophical & psychological ideas and teachings, taking the form of a narrative dialogue between philosophical young men.
The whole book is addressed to answer a single question:
“How can one be happy?”
Introduction:
The book is written in a dialogue format between a youth & philosopher who is in search of happiness.
The book consists of more than 250 pages. The book is divided into 5 parts which are addressed as 5 nights.
Part One: First Night: Deny Trauma
The important thing is not what one is born with, but what use one makes of equipment. This topic suggests the reader focus on what you have around you to become a better version.
Alderian psychology of courage. Your unhappiness cannot be blamed on your past or your environment. And it is not a lack of your competence. You just lack the courage to pursue happiness.
Part Two: Second Night: All problems are interpersonal relationship problems
Encouragement: This part talks about how to accept yourself & then regardless of the outcomes, you should have the courage to step forward.
Inferiority complex is an excuse: The book tells that inferiority complex is used as an excuse meaning it shows that you don't want to make a real effort and sacrifice personal pleasures and blame others.
Part Three: Third Night: Discard other people’s tasks
Recognition: There is no need to be recognized by others cause it is not necessary. If you only wish to be recognized then you will lead a life of the following expectation.
Separation of tasks: The book suggests steps get rid of interpersonal relationship problems in terms of the separation of tasks. In other words, you need to govern your tasks rather than others' tasks.
Part Four: Fourth Night: Where the center of the world is
Community Feeling: In this part, the philosopher emphasizes the importance of having a sense of belonging through active participation in a community. This can lead to commitment.
Part five: Fifth Night: To live in earnest in the here & now
Not self-affirmation but self-acceptance: Accept “this me” just as you are and have the courage to change what can be changed. This is called self-acceptance.
Life is not a line but a series of dots: Here, dots refer to present moments that lead to life. So focus on the present moments.
End: The philosopher answers the question to “How can one be happy” it is by
“Having the courage to be disliked”
Review Time:
The dialog & conversation format is exciting and it sparks a lot of interesting debate.
Some points/topics are hard to understand in terms of intellectual thought, so I had to read a couple of paragraphs.
I had a personal disagreement with some topics as, in a particular chapter, it is said that you have to treat a person the same even if that person has wronged you.
Some of the topics are debatable and I had discussions (although healthy) and it was good.
The book may not be a suitable read for a beginner but can be a good read for an advanced reader as it involves lots of high vocabulary.
Finally, I would rate the book as 5 - lessons and ideologies and 3–4 for the book on the whole keeping in mind on the difficulty level of understanding the content.
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Until seeing you in the next post, see you. Happy Reading!
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